Below See: TIPS, IDEAS, AND SUGGESTIONS ABOUT FEELING STRESSED AND OVERWHELMED
Feeling Stressed and Overwhelmed Raising Children
I have been told for years that feeling stressed and overwhelmed comes with the territory of raising kids. And, after raising five kids, now grown, I definitely believe that statement. I constantly felt stressed and overwhelmed over the years.
Thinking back, I contribute most of my stressed-out feelings to the 12 years gap between my five children.
Meaning, when my three younger children were born…18 months apart from each other….my two older daughters were already heavily involved in school, various sports, and lots of extracurricular activities.
Any parent will tell you that running around from one activity to another, whether it is with one or five kids, will make you feel stressed and overwhelmed!
Additionally, my husband worked long-hour shift work, so he was barely around for many years to help with husband and daddy duties. Again, that only added to my stressed out feelings!
Honestly, it was extremely challenging playing and cuddling with my three toddlers, while dealing with the complications of raising teenagers.
Cooing at one end and trying to advise, and oftentimes reprimand, at the other end. To say the least, I was 100 % stressed and overwhelmed most of the time!
What to do When You Feel Overwhelmed as a Parent
If you are feeling overwhelmed as a parent, here are a few ideas and strategies you can use and think about to relax and destress.
Acknowledge Your Feelings and Emotions:
Acknowledging that you feel overwhelmed will help reduce feelings of guilt or shame. Parenting is hard! Accepting your feelings of being overwhelmed is beneficial for you mentally and physically.
Talk about it to yourself or others. Deal with the issues, and move on. It is perfectly acceptable to be and feel overwhelmed as a parent!
Ask Yourself Why You Are Feeling Overwhelmed:
It’s important to know WHY you are feeling overwhelmed. Try to figure out the source of your overwhelmed emotions so you can address the cause.
Learning the meaning behind why you are feeling overwhelmed may resolve the issue and help you feel better.
Do Something You Enjoy:
If you are feeling overwhelmed, try to intentionally focus on doing something you truly enjoy.
Whether it is exercising, dancing, reading, listening to music, or spending time with friends. Doing an activity, you enjoy will lessen your overwhelmed emotions.
Ask For a Hug:
Did you know that getting hugged can immediately reduce stress levels in your body? A good hug can decrease pressure and tension mentally and physically.
If you are feeling overwhelmed, definitely ask a friend for a hug!
Slow Down:
The feeling of being overwhelmed may occur due to the pressure we put on ourselves on a daily basis to do, do, do, and go, go, go!
Sadly, we generally do not give ourselves an opportunity to slow down or take a break from our overly busy schedules.
If you are feeling overwhelmed, be sure to slow down and give yourself a break from the busyness in your life!
Breathe:
Studies have proven that breathing exercises can reduce feeling overwhelmed. There are many breathing exercises that relieve stress and improve one’s mood.
Deep breathing, in through your nose and out through your mouth offers psychological and physiological relief as well.
Meditation:
Mindful meditation practices are easily available to help reduce overwhelmed feelings.
Mindful exercises and movements, such as yoga, can also help calm the mind and decrease stress and anxiety.
Calm and Headspace are two excellent resources for providing relaxation of the mind and body.
Talk to a Counselor or Therapist
Talking to a counselor or therapist can be extremely effective if you are feeling overwhelmed.
Often having someone else’s point of view can change your perspective on a particular situation.
Speaking with a mental health professional can help you identify concerns and establish strategies for improvement.
Feeling Stressed and Overwhelmed Raising Grandkids
Over the last several years, I have been raising my grandkids. But I have to admit that at times, I feel more stressed and overwhelmed than I did raising my own children.
Perhaps it is because there are so many generational changes over the past few years. Also, the surge of technology, especially social media, has far exceeded what it was when my children were growing up.
Before our grandchildren moved in with us, there were a lot of negative circumstances surrounding their parent’s drug and alcohol use.
So, without hesitation, my husband and I moved our two grandkids into our home and sought legal custody. We knew they needed us. And they knew they needed a loving, safe environment.
After they moved in with us, it was determined that both grandchildren had emotional and psychological issues they needed to work through. On a continual basis, I work on helping them figure their life out. And, they work on figuring themselves out the best they can.
They truly love their mom, but at the time they moved in, she needed to get her mental and physical health together. I am happy to report she is clean and sober, but my grandchildren have chosen to remain with my husband and me, and I am still their legal guardian.
I have technically become their parent. I have attended all school meetings. And, I schedule and attend all of their medical appointments…which are frequent.
At times the pressure of raising them can feel overwhelming. Additionally, my husband often feels stressed and overwhelmed trying to understand some of the emotional challenges my grandkids face.
My husband has never been an emotional type of guy. So, for him attempting to understand my grandson’s autistic personality traits and my granddaughter’s ADHD, can be very overwhelming.
Most times, he manages well and deals with the challenges. But other times, we argue about the kids. Again, making me feel more stressed and overwhelmed!
The bottom line is, I love my grandkids, but they are a lot of work!
Learning to Decrease Feeling Stressed and Overwhelmed
Over the past several years, I have found 5 Free Methods for decreasing feelings of being stressed and overwhelmed.
Try these ideas yourself to feel relaxed and refreshed without spending any money!
1. MEDITATION:
If you have not tried meditation, this may be the perfect time to give it a try. Learning to meditate can give you inner peace and solace during the hardest times of your life.
Once you learn how to meditate, it is available for you at any time. Meditation provides an opportunity to relieve stress in your mind and body.
2. EXERCISE:
Exercise is an easy method to relieve feeling stressed and overwhelmed. And, it’s free! Taking a walk around your neighborhood or at a nearby mall is an excellent way to restore yourself and your energy.
Keep in mind, exercise is any type of movement, whether you exercise indoors or outdoors. Exercise can be as simple or as complex as you want.
Exercise releases endorphins in your mind and body to help reduce stress, anxiety, and depression.
3. READING:
I LOVE reading! Reading can take you to different places around the world while becoming different characters. The stories inside books can revitalize your mind and creativity.
If you don’t enjoy reading books, grab a magazine and read the latest gossip page. Reading someone else’s ideas and thoughts can make you reflect on your own feelings and viewpoints. Reading can be very relaxing and help decrease stress.
4. JOURNALING:
Journaling your daily reflections and experiences can give insight into your deeper feelings. Keeping a writing pad or journal nearby gives you an opportunity to immediately write something down without
forgetting it.
Additionally, journaling is a free way to clear your mind while documenting your innermost thoughts and emotions.
Reflecting on your written ideas and thoughts can reduce and decrease stress and other adverse emotions.
5. RELIGION/CHURCH:
Regardless of your religious beliefs or faith, church can be an opportunity to cleanse your soul and your innermost passions. Going to a scheduled service or sitting in silent prayer in a church can allow your mind space for reflection.
The church can be a source of strength for those who feel connected to a higher power. Church is a free space to be alone or with others who share your same beliefs and convictions.
Visiting a church can decrease stress and be an enjoyable refreshing experience for everyone.
These ideas will help calm down your mind anywhere and help decrease stress at any time. See How to Calm Down Your Mind.
Making the Best of Living with Stress
Most parents may deal with feeling stressed and overwhelmed until their children are grown and go off to college. Generally, at that point, parents’ lives slow down, and life becomes less stressful.
Yet, that is not my life or my situation. Even though our five children are grown and out on their own, my husband and I do not have an empty nest. We have two grandchildren nestled safely in our nest, who probably will be with us for many years to come.
This may be true for many grandparents who are raising grandkids. Many grandparents raising grandkids have not experienced having their own empty nest. Grandparents raising grandkids continue to parent grandchildren years after their children are grown.
Reparenting, or raising children again, can be exhausting for grandparents. But it can also be extremely rewarding knowing and seeing the growth grandchildren experience in our care.
Being there and raising our grandchildren, as we did for our children, is a selfless gift we give to our children, our grandchildren, and to ourselves.
Although we may feel stressed and overwhelmed from time to time, we have learned how to move through the challenges in order to seek and find the rewards.
Reflecting on Living a Stressed and Overwhelmed Life
Now, on the brink of retirement and becoming an official senior citizen…not yet, but soon… it is important to reflect on living a stressed and overwhelmed life.
In my mind and in my heart, I know what I signed up for when I took legal custody of my grandkids several years ago.
I vowed to raise them and do everything possible to help them become responsible, respectful, and effective adults.
Through it all, yes, I am tired, stressed and overwhelmed, but I love my grandkids unconditionally and I will be here for them as long as I can.
TIPS, IDEAS, AND SUGGESTIONS ABOUT FEELING STRESSED AND OVERWHELMED
-
- Identify the cause of your stressed and overwhelmed emotions in order to cope with the situation constructively.
-
- Take a break and talk to someone about your stressed and overwhelmed feelings. Getting assistance from family, friends or a support person can be effective during stressful times.
-
- Slow down and give yourself a break! Parenting is hard! You are doing a great job so give yourself a mental and physical break!
-
- Breathe! Deep and thoughtful breathing during times of stress is very helpful. Practicing breathing patterns can alleviate periods of stress, anxiety and tension.
-
- When you are feeling stressed and overwhelmed focus on doing something you truly enjoy. Take a walk, sing, dance, draw, read or rest. Enjoying something for yourself can help you relax and destress.
